Trying to stay in the closet doesn’t work, seriously!

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Summary: Ian is secretly gay, in a private relationship with his room mate Evan. They have a happy relationship and though they can’t openly show it most of the time, they truly love each other. His parents keep pestering him to get a girlfriend though. While he may not have a girlfriend, he does have a boyfriend who has crossdressed before so what else can he do but ask for a favour from his lovely boyfriend and convince his parents he is dating a girl. What impact will that have on their relationship as boyfriends though, when one won’t come out of the closet?

It wasn’t everyday you got to see a sheepish man sitting in a fancy restaurant with a suspiciously manly woman, it also wasn’t everyday that behind them were a table of ten giggling boys shoveling food into their mouths rather inelegantly for the place. “Ian, are you sure they are coming today? I’ve waited for hours in this long black wig that’s beginning to itch, a long red dress over sweaty pantyhose and to top this all off, stockings and high heeled boots!”, the ‘woman’ snapped in indignation. The man sighed and wiped some sweat off of his brow, glancing menacingly at the laughing onlookers before patting the woman’s knee, “If they don’t turn up soon then we can leave, and go on a secret date saying my girlfriend is a very busy woman, but please wait a teeny bit longer. Shut up guys, Zhen Huan does not look like a weird woman, he is fine young lady and hopefully my parents will take one look and be happy.”, Ian murmured.

The Yi couple appeared at the door of the restaurant just as Riley had cheekily pointed out that the soothing kiss Ian had given his boyfriend had smudged his bright red lipstick, and Evan was trying to inconspicuously dash to the mens bathroom while no one was looking to see what one he went in. He had to remain seated and recieved the inquiring glances of the person he assume was Ian’s mother, maintaining the appearance of an embarrassed, innocent young woman, hard considering he was a man through and through. “Oh my son, you are quite the rough lover apparently, that lipstick smear is impressive. I apologize on his behalf, Miss uhm…”, she trailed off. Fuck, they hadn’t planned a fake name, on the idea that it would be a flying visit when there wasn’t enough time for names, he had to think fast.

“My name is Wang Ling, nice to me you Mrs Yi. Please allow me to keep dating your son, he is a very nice man.”, he answered cutely, raising the pitch of his voice to sound feminine. The SpeXial members being them burst out laughing, and someone choked on their food at the rappers squeeky voice lisping so cutely, and upon reflection, it hurt his vocal cords to reach such a note. Soon Ian’s beautiful girlfriend would turn mute from vocal cord strain, and whose fault was that? The couple cooed, the man assured his sons ‘girlfriend’ that she could continue to date Ian and expressed his pleasure knowing that such a lovely woman was in the family, again someone choked tellingly and Evan swore he would choke them all at the dorms later for being idiots in a difficult situation. “I must leave, I have business waiting for me. It was nice meeting you Mr and Mrs Yi, take care on the journey home. See you at home sweetheart!”, he rambled desperately, hoping they thought he had actually business and not just a desire to run the hell away.

The two elders took the excuse as the truth, and chatted with their son for a minute before they left themselves. Ian let out a drawn out sigh of relief, and the other members took the opportunity to let out the laughter they had been trying desperately to hold in. He sighed as half of the twenty something year old men rolled around on the floor like kids, and the rest sat in a group snickering like immature girls while he contemplated how to persuade his boyfriend to still be with him after the humiliation of having to dress up like a woman. The manly rapper pretending to be a graceful lady was something that obviously wouldn’t go well, at least Evan agreed to do it and save his closet life from being revealed to his crazy parents. One day he would have to come out, but it was too difficult to think of for now…

The eleven men loaded into the company van, making fun of the fillial son who went to such great lengths to please his mother that he asked, more like begged, his own boyfriend to be a woman for some time. “If this means we break up, then I’ll have to come out to Mama and Baba because my lovely ‘girlfriend’ will make me. Ohmygod what will I do if Evan breaks up with me???? He is my life and if he goes back to his mother’s house even for a temporary holiday the very concept of my existence is in danger!”, he wailed. Sam and Wayne gave him judging looks, “This is why you don’t date anyone, even if they are six feet of mixed Canadian Chinese perfection, your words not mine, because no one or no situation is foolproof. I mean, that man in that drama was killed because the woman was actually part of an enemy family, and I don’t want to die.”, Win chimed in, completely serious. Ian facepalmed, his band mates were total drama queens and idiots.

Evan didn’t look that happy when they got back, minus the female clothing and in normal shorts and t-shirt borrowed from someone in the band, but smiled at everyone. “Ian sweetheart, a word in the bedroom please, alone. Watch a movie guys, this might get nasty and you won’t wanna hear it.”, he announced calmly. They all gulped and scarpered into the living room in fear, leaving the rookie rapper alone as the main vocalist said to do. “Today, Mr Yi, was not only embarassing for my pride as a man, but it told me something important that I never thought of as a problem before. You refuse to come out of the closet, going as far as to emotionally blackmail me into crossdressing, and it makes me think, how far can we go as a couple if you never admit how fucking gay you are because you are afraid.”, he snapped. Ian tried to hold his boyfriend’s hand to mellow his anger, but Evan wasn’t having it and pulled away to another corner of the room.

“Babycakes, I can assure you that I love you with all of my heart, it’s just that I’m not ready to face society’s judgement. I promise that eventually it will be easier, and maybe we can even get married in our home country one day, if we wait and stay together till then.”, he rambled desperately, playing with his short hair nervously. His boyfriend turned away, like he would be able to continue of he truly knew what Ian’s reaction would be as he delivered the blows of their relationship problems and to hide the tears falling softly down his light caramel cheeks. “I can’t do that Ian, it feels like I am the only one ready in this relationship to face reality, China isn’t going to change yet, and I’d like you to remember that there is an ex waiting for me to come back. Time will not halt for you to be ready, I want stability and if that doesn’t come with you, I’ll have to move on. I’m taking a break, back to Mama, you have till then to tell your parents at least the true relationship you are in.

“It was true, Ian was non functional when Evan wasn’t with him, especially as the older man had actually taken emergency leave on the grounds of emotional distress sufficient to affect work and gone to his mother’s mansion in the Taiwanese countryside. The members knew they couldn’t intervene too much, as it was obviously a personal conflict causing them both the heartbreak, but apparently some gentle encouragement was necessary to speed things along. The second eldest took the lead, Wayne the hot macho one, in operation reunite the Ivan couple in happy gayness. They even told the poor management what was going on however ridiculous the situation was, in so many ways. It was believable that Evan and Ian were in a relationship, but the meeting his parents as a woman fiasco?

Ian was comfort eating in front of men with swords when they came back to the dorms soon after the operation started with the manager. He was shoving cookies and cream ice cream in, while lamenting about how his babycakes was such a good boyfriend back then and how he wanted to go back to when their relationship was new and simple. “Manager ge, help me!!!! I need my babycakes back, I can’t live without him!!!!”, he wailed. Feng Xian Yu sometime regretted not going into acting like his brother, because now he had multiple idiots to sort out, at least Jian Yu only had Wang Qing to deal with. “Yi, you are an idiot, but I think I can help you. Only if you agree to come out to your parents, not the whole world but definitely them, or Zhen Huan will never take you back.”, he said bluntly, ignoring the moist puppy eyes of the youngest.

Evan’s mother didn’t know what to do. Although she loved her son, it was nice when he lived peacefully with his little friends and let his parents enjoy life, without a grown man cocooned in blankets moping like a teenage girl. Mama Ma was stuck between throwing him back to the dorm and the eleven dumbasses, and coddling him like a child, because despite the expectations of a twenty five year old man behaving like one, her little Zhen Huan could do no wrong, even if he wept like a teenage girl most of the day and watched the same old wuxia drama. “Ma Zhen Huan! Did you finally go out like a normal person or are you in bed still?”, she asked periodically, recieving the same muffled yes and turning away. Daddy Ma wasn’t so understanding, and kept badgering his wife to find out why his adult son was wallowing in whatever he was consumed by. “Jia, it’s been a fortnight, he hasn’t properly talked to us since he turned up with an overnight bag from the dormitory. Talk to him, mothers are better at this feelings business than fathers, and make my son an adult male again.”, he begged his wife, at wits end after the heart wrenching crying stopped them from sleeping.

It was the day that Mama Ma decided to get to the bottom of Evan’s return to home that Ian was thrown at the doorstep of the family home. “Zhen Huan! Me and your father have had enough, either tell us what is going on, or get out of the house and be a productive member of society.”, she yelled up the stairs. A few slow minutes later, a person cocooned in blankets appeared at the door, almost unrecognisable in the shadows of the hall. “I broke up with Ian mum, he won’t tell his parents that he is dating a man. He hasn’t called for weeks, does that mean he never really wanted to date me in the first place?”, Evan whimpered. His mother’s heart bled and she instantly felt apologetic for being angry when her sweet baby was so upset. “Come to the kitchen sunshine, Mama will make you a caramel latte and listen to all your problems. Just ignore daddy, he hasn’t realised what happened yet.”, she coaxed gently.

Wes and Xian Yu called the mansion prior to dumping the youngest at the gate with a warm coat and fully charged phone, to make sure the lady of the house would see him and hopefully Ian and Evan would make up. The servants said that the lady was in the kitchen with the young master, but Ian could wait in the lounge to see Mrs Ma, and being desperate, Xian Yu took the offer and saw the arrangement through. He could hear crying from the kitchen, crying strangely familiar if he thought hard enough about it, and he reached for the bottle of liquor left on the table for strength. Evan accompanied his mother to the lounge, unknowing who was there, and tried to run upstairs when he saw his now ex boyfriend, but his mother kept a firm grip on his arm through the many blankets. “Mum I don’t want to see him, I came home to avoid seeing that face that broke my heart.”, he argued weakly. Mrs Ma sighed, “You two have this problem, not me and you, and only you and Ian can sort this out. If not, back to the dorms even if you insist on camping outside the gates like a hobo.

“Ian coughed nervously, trying not to stare at the bundle of blankets opposite that somehow was his beloved boyfriend. “What do you want Ian, another chunk of my broken heart? I told you then, come out and be my partner or go out the door.”, Evan growled softly. The other guy burst into a fountain of tears, “I’m sorry baby, I couldn’t live without you, so the guys and manager Ge made me come here. Take me back, please!!!! I’ll call my parents right now and tell them about you if you want!!”, Ian wept desperately. His ex boyfriend thought about everything he had just heard, tears and all, and deep down in his heart, he wanted his love back more than he wanted nothing more to do with him. “Well, I can’t say no. I still love you idiot, openly gay or not, but I would still like you to introduce me to your parents like I said before. Let me clean up and leave, Xian Ge and the members will be wondering what has happened to me.”, Evan replied sweetly.

On the way back into the city, Ian stopped at Chaumet Taipei 101, to Evan’s delight and surprise. “PoPo, I never said that we needed rings to be official to your parents, let’s go straight back to Ge and the guy’s.”, he stuterred. His boyfriend kissed him quiet, putting a heavy dusting of rouge on his tanned cheeks, holding the motion till Ian was able to simply lead him in without a word or action of protest. There were hundreds of sparking jewels in the store, and the huge price tags accompanying the sparking jewels that Evan chose to ignore because obviously someone else was buying if they dragged him in to the expensive store. Ian told him to pick out a set of whatever caught his eye, and being an obliging lover he went to the Maison collections and looked through the cases of diamond and sapphire Josephine Aigriette pieces. “It’s this ring Ian, it’s perfect for us. One sapphire among a paving of diamonds, and then there’s us, a unique sapphire among the common diamonds that pale in comparison to the rich blue.”, Evan smiled happily as he called the youngest over to the cabinet.

The two reunited lovebirds returned to the SpeXial dorms with a new addition, the two indentical sapphire and platinum rings snugly on their fingers. “Woah, that was fast! Congratulations bro in bagging a wife after you nearly lose him completely, when can I be the page boy?”, Riley piped up cheekily. The manager sighed deeply, “Good to see you back with Mr Yi, Young master Ma. I’ll be going home finally, to see Jian Yu and Qing Ge, while I think a meeting with your parents is in order Mr Yi. Good luck, and congratulations on your engagement.” The members gasped, engaged? “Yep, Ian proposed to me in Chaumet Taipei 101, it was so romantic, even sliding the ring which fit perfectly on. It’s official guys, and we need to tell Mr and Mrs Yi that they will be invited to a wedding as soon as the law to legalise our marriage passes.”, the vocalist chirped cheerfully.

One again, Evan and Ian sat at one table, and the members behind them. Except there was no crossdressing and acting, only reality, as the Canadian Chinese sipped ice tea in a slim cut shirt and jeans and the man next to him took sneaky sips from the same glass until he was swatted away playfully. Mr and Mrs Yi entered in casual clothes chatting idly, pausing at the sight of their son and another man playing among themselves in matching rings. “Ma, Ba, I won’t lie to you anymore about dating successfully business women. This is Ma Zhen Huan, aka Evan. He is my financè since last month and loving and supportive boyfriend of almost three years, and I love him to the moon and back. Please give us your blessings in our coming marriage.”, Ian interrupted their thoughts as politely as possible. His mother smiled, and so did his father, “Sweetheart, we wanted to say this to you anyway, just make sure you’re happy in the relationship and it’s fine. I’m sure Evan is everything you need if you two have that much history together, there is nothing more satisfying for a parent to see their children happy, and all I see is smiles here. Take care of Ian, Xiao Huan, and do contact us when the wedding date has been set, we’d love to come.”

[A/N: Apologies for any incorrect spelling or grammar that I haven’t noticed, but Evan and Ian just warm my heart so much I can’t help but write endless drabbles. School holidays now so I’ll probably get one more drabble up before the end at least.]

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